I never realize just how much stuff we accumulate, even with purging our stuff every few years before moving to a new duty station. The amount of products I have accumulated in the past 6 months of reviewing has definitely added to the pile. Luckily, there is a Coast Guard yard sale being organized to help everyone get rid of their stuff before transfer season. I’m usually eager to go through stuff to see what we can get rid of, but not so much this time. This time is hard for me because I need to get rid of all our baby items, some of which I’ve had since before Brickman was born nearly 9 years ago and some are the cute cloths that Fancy wore. I absolutely love having a tiny baby to snuggle and nurse, so getting rid of the baby stuff is a stark reminder that there will be no more growing a baby for 9 months and bringing home a tiny newborn. Although my husband and I think that out family is perfect right now, I still can’t help mourning the fact that Baby is our last child and turning 18 months old this week to boot! Moving on from the child bearing years makes me feel old beyond my 32 years, and is another new stage of life that I’m just beginning. And its not like this is a new decision either, my husband had a vasectomy a few weeks after Baby was born. I guess getting rid of the baby toys, swings, and baby bathtub are just hitting me hard because I no longer have a tiny baby, but a rambunctious toddler. My days having Baby gaze into my eyes while having my body provide her nourishment are numbered, and that number is up to her to decide when she is ready to wean. She is already dropping nursing sessions as the adventures of the day attract her attention and she needs me less and less. But such are the seasons of life I guess, so I will cherish the middle of the night nursing session, being nap trapped, and being the center of her universe for as long as it lasts.
I do know I have new and exciting things to look for as she grows too. I have been getting all 3 kids into the kitchen cooking and baking with me. We as a family have been able to go do more fun things (in the not always optimal Pacific Northwest weather) because there is no longer a tiny babe requiring so much attention. Seeing all 3 of my kids interacting more and more each day fills my heart with joy, and I look forward to seeing their bonds grow as they do. It won’t be long now until we get back out to the woods or the remote beaches on back country camping trips since we will not need to carry Baby much longer. Instead of more lamenting on what I’m losing, I must go enjoy what I have and get together the ingredients to bake cupcakes and make lemonade with the kids so that they can be involved in the yard sale too.
“I’ll love you forever,
I’ll like you for always,
As long as I’m living, my baby you’ll be.” -Robert Munsch